Home care - Growing old - it isn't easy!
So I find that the elder care business is a difficult one to maintain if you are the least bit of a sensitive type.
As adults, we go through life sometimes caring for children, sometimes we care for pets; we care for the disabled – however – we are not always the answer. We talk with many families, and find that the one thing that we can most often count on is dynamics – and no one really escapes family dynamics.
"How do we take care of an aging parent’s physical and mental demands and still continue to have our own healthy and productive life with our own family?" This is a question that comes up quite often in our work. Usually it is about the time that exhaustion to the family caregiver has come into play.
It is a good question - and appropriately, without a correct answer. There is no one right answer as much as there is no "one size fits all" in the world of elder care. Everyone is a bit different in their needs, wants and lifestyles. When we meet with someone to discuss private home care, we are very careful to acknowledge these inconsistencies and the dynamics that might be involved. The important thing is to remember that every situation is different - as different as the individuals themselves.
In my world, my children – all of them - give me the ability to write. The paths their lives have taken and the roads yet to take – all show promise. They also let me know that I have done a good job – sometimes spiced with too much guilt – but a good job none the less. What mother does not provide a healthy dose of guilt?!
In the paradigm of caring for a parent, guilt can also work the other way! Children, like parents, will often go to extremes to please a parent that may be behaving in a selfish or reprehensible way. Enter guilt and its magical mystery. AND, the question returns ...
"How do we take care of an aging parent’s physical and mental demands and still continue to have our own healthy and productive life with our own family?" Sometimes you just need to ask for some help to get through those times, and remember - you don't have to do it alone.